When asked to think of someone who communicates well in a particular context the first person I thought of was our Mental Health Consultant. For confidentiality reasons I will just refer to him as Mr. D. Mr. D meets with us each month to discuss stresses that families on our caseloads are going through and to discusses strategies we can use to better communicate with and to assist these families. He will also discuss how it affects us personally, especially if staff is becoming "burned out". From the beginning I noticed that Mr. D. always looks in you the eye while you are talking, he does not interrupt, ad he will ask specific questions. It is also apparent that he takes a minute to consider what he is going to say before giving feedback on particular situations. He makes it obvious that he wants the whole picture before he considers what he is going to say in return. The conversations with Mr. D. are so relaxed and informal that it makes it very easy to speak to him. Often I find myself coming up with a solution long before he suggests it. I'm sure this is part of his job but he never makes you feel like he is trying to influence your decisions, but rather just discussing different possibilities and perspectives.
I definitely try to model my own communication behaviors after Mr. D. I always try to look at people when they are speaking. I try to indicate that I am interested in what others have to say by looking at them and responded appropriately as they talk. My biggest downfall is wanting to jump ahead and think about what I want to say in return before they are even finished. I don't interrupt but have definitely found myself already thinking of a response before the other person has even finished. I also like the way that Mr. D. reflects back what the other person has said and try to do this as well to ensure that I have a clear understanding of what they are communicating. I think that when you reflect back what the other person has said it shows them that you were truly listening and that you have a clear understanding of what they have said. It sends the message that you respect them and value what they have to say.
I definitely try to model my own communication behaviors after Mr. D. I always try to look at people when they are speaking. I try to indicate that I am interested in what others have to say by looking at them and responded appropriately as they talk. My biggest downfall is wanting to jump ahead and think about what I want to say in return before they are even finished. I don't interrupt but have definitely found myself already thinking of a response before the other person has even finished. I also like the way that Mr. D. reflects back what the other person has said and try to do this as well to ensure that I have a clear understanding of what they are communicating. I think that when you reflect back what the other person has said it shows them that you were truly listening and that you have a clear understanding of what they have said. It sends the message that you respect them and value what they have to say.
Hi TMahaney,
ReplyDeleteNice to meet you.
I like the way that you look up to someone you work with. Dr.D sounds like a great person who cares about his co-workers as well as the families. I like the way that he is able to give advice instead of telling people what to do and how to think. I also have the same problem with jumping to conclusions before listening to what the other person is saying. As my husband Randy tells me I am a great communicator, but a lousy listener.
Hi Toni,
ReplyDeleteI look forward to working with you again. Isn't it great how a person with good communication skills brings out the best in us? I also have the tendency to think about what I'm going to say next rather than listen to what the other person is saying. Thank you for pointing that out. It was a lesson learned for me!
Hi, Toni,
ReplyDeleteMr. D sounds like a great model for an effective communicator. I am glad you have someone like that in your profession.